Miracles

Tonight I have a very heavy heart and mind.  My little brother said it best.."three weeks ago one of my biggest concerns was my golf swing and now.....:)" It's amazing how different things look to me right now.  It's humbling as I see a hand, greater than mine, orchestrating this new journey!  When I was first told that I had some "cancerous looking cells"  I knew right away, that this wasn't going to be basic.  I had that feeling, I knew.  We were told so many different things in such a small window that it became stressful.  I just wanted to know, I wanted to start my battle and I wanted to know my opponent.  Well, now I know.  I know who I'm going against.  I am going to share it with you the way is was taught to me, not the medical terms......you're welcome! :) I have been diagnosed with an advanced, stage 4 melanoma.  They removed a pretty good sized mass in my armpit.  We got all the scan results back and I have a few more affected areas in my torso and back area.  The Gut punch came when out of nowhere, I was told that they have also found at least 5 tumors in my brain. That one I wasn't completely ready for.  I have multiple appointments with the Huntsman Inst. next week, and my surgeon spoke directly to the oncologist who would be working with me, and he was very optimistic.......whatever that means:) So the fight begins!  I felt for the first time, maybe ever, what it means for me to know that I have an eternal family, because in an instant mortality became so fragile and now seemed like I'm "on the clock".  Many years ago there was a famous saying during a very important (sure) athletic event.  The term used as the underdogs were about to win was: "do you believe in miracles?" Now, I feel offended that such a phrase was used to try and capture an athletic event, an event so irrelevant to our individual lives.  On the flip side, many people do not believe in miracles unless it's magical, or mystical.   Out of this world if you will, maybe another parting of the red sea?  Again, such a sad hope or vision of a miracle.  Let me tell you what I think are miracles and you can take some time to count the hundreds in your life later.  A miracle is a wife who lost her mother and sister at an early age, finds out her husband has cancer and is "allowed" to sleep like a baby during one of the hardest weeks in our marriage.  A miracle is when I get hundreds and hundreds of emails, texts, calls messages etc. telling me that I am on the prayer list for people of all different faiths, because they love someone who loves me! A miracle is a brother or sister who put their own families aside for a moment to make sure their brother KNOWS they love him.  A miracle is when I have been given strength beyond my own to look at only the positives, not the negatives in this situation.  The miracle is of a father who works harder than anyone I know who fasts, multiple times, for his son, but has the strength to work and provide for his family. A miracle is a mother of a special needs daughter that goes through more pain and anguish than most of us can imagine, and still has time and energy to do anything she can for her brother.  Do I believe in miracles?  YES!!! Because I know them when I see them and I will not ignore what they truly are in my life.........MIRACLES!!!  Thank you everybody, I love you all!! We got this!!